?!?!?!?!

I have officially come across the most wanna be T-shirt that I've ever seen....

As I was walking to office this morning after a rather disturbing bus ride and coming to the conclusion that classy colours like creme or off white are not meant for poor old souls like me who travel by a bus every freaking morning! So as I start ascending the flight of stairs...there it was..this T-shirt worn by a rather tapori-ish guy which read: "If being sexy is a crime...ARREST ME!" :O

I mean wtf! what is this world getting to.....Voix, I'd give it to you, if only i would have had the sense to take out my phone and click!...maybe he should marry that "barbie for president woman"!! won't they be adorable together...and then maybe, they can both roam around hand in hand wearing Ts that read "If being inspired by Govinda is a crime, Arrest us!"

Guess Who's Back!..PLUS...College Realities!

A very warm hello to all my readers (I am myself amazed at the usage of the term ‘all’ for the handful, and that too a toddler’s hand, who find time to read all this crap!). First all of all I’d like to extend my heartfelt gratitude to this very handful. I really appreciate you finding time to read all this and that too considering the fact that my blogging follows a periodic motion.

All those who know me would know what my blogging again means. You see, from times immemorial, events have been used to keep track of time. For example, when the sun is at such and such location in the sky, its such and such time, etc. Similarly, my blogging serves as a rather reliable clock (:P). "My blogging again signifies that I am totally jobless once again which happens every six months when my college vacations start and I, with the same hard to kill spirit, come for an internship only to find myself in yet another office in the day and a boring session in the evenings with nothing to do, except, well, bug all of you with all this!": This was the line that was supposed to be there in the post as I had initially typed it out, but then due to some technological screw ups i never could actualy post it. But don't worry, this re-attempt of mine at blogging also signifies my extreme boredome, except that I AM in college with a knee which is definitelyh not fine and is not even officially broken. Its a sucky Friday night and I've just finished watching "Billu Barber" (umm..ya whatever!).. the only outing I managed to have was to the orthopedist (remember the knee..cmon, you gotta follow the flow!) when the normal people who have a LIFE are out partying! :(

So well I Am Bored, and thus I shall bore you! hoo haa haa haa! Let's see now, what do I need to write about. Actually, there is this entire list of things I prepared in my head which I had to blog about, but bunk all that, I found something better (for the moment).

For all those kids out there who are not yet in college, here is a list of some of the most commonly spread myths about a college:

I) Expectations Related:

1) A college is supposed to have a culture of fun filled events! (phhoosshhh!, you are mistaken brother)
2) When I'm in college, my life will be rockin so let me drag along nicely through my school days! (hah! wishful thinking)
3) Colleges are supposed to be the way they are shown in Television (you better throw that box out right NOW!)

II) Academics Related:

1) Higher the GPA the more intelligent you are (yes yes, this is just to let everyone know that I accept that I might be a dumbass so dont push it in!)
2) Lower the GPA the less intelligent you are (this had to be mentioned separately..cmon, you know, for those who have a higher GPA to understand better...shhh)
3) Everything that I will read in a Law School will make sense (ha ha..no comments)
4) Teachers in a Law School are supposed to know everything about everything (definitely not)
5) Teachers in a Law School are supposed to know everything about their own bloody subject (surprised?.dont be)

III) Love- life related:

1) Peple who ae dating love each other.
2) More mportantly, people who are dating each other DO NOT love anyone else (get the hint!)
3) Assuming that people who are dating love each other, people fall in luv only once during at least their college life!
4) Every broken heart needs at least a month to heal!
5) There is a limit to the number of times one can fall in love.
5) Above all, good guys always get what they deserve ultimately!

IV) General People Related:

1) A vegetarian is someone who doesn't eat meat (Who said....umm..cough Divi cough)
2) If you're nice to everyone you will be called NICE and not DIPLOMATIC every single day!
3) If you're DIPLOMATIC you'll be called DIPLOMATIC and not NICE!
4) College level students are mature (the best one so far! ha ha ha ha!)

Now I can understand if not all of you agree with what I have written. But if you do, please do let me know. And if you do not agree with them and in your college these statements are actually true....till what age does your colleges accept applications?!?! ;)

Lap top?!..

I had noticed this thing earlier but it never incurred to me like this. So yesterday when I was just generally surfing the net in my typical way, keeping the lap top on my bed, after I was done as soon as I picked up ma laptop, I realized that it was burning hot at its fundament, so much so that even the bedsheet felt like it had been freshly ironed. And that is when it struck me. Aren't laptos supposed to be used on our laps?! So what is this, some sort of a cospiracy? I mean if they really ARE supposed to be kept on your lap, then howcome they are so damn hot at that very place which would be ON our laps. Do they wanna burn us or something? And that is when I realized that I have placed my pally at every possible place, the bed, the table, the ground, even haning mid air at times with the meagre support of my hands, but never on my lap!! Ironical, isnt it? But the interesting thing is, it seems as though it was made never to be placed on your lap. Reaons? Many. Firstly because my laptop one of those sad HP Pavilion notebooks who's screen won't bend beyond a certain level (which level, by the way, is rather uncomfortable) so its virtually impossibe to keep it on yor lap and look at the screen at the same time. It's like Heisenberg's uncertainity principle, either you can keep it on your lap OR you can look at the screen with full certainity, to be able to do both fully is IMPOSSIBLE. Secondly, the burning base. I mean I'm pretty sure that if I keep my so called 'lap'top on my lap for more than 5 minutes, I'd end up cautereizing (I like exaggeration, so please don't mind) my sexy thighs (see...exaggeration!). Thirdly, if one actually tries it, it is damn uncomfprtable to use the mouse-pad if the laptop is actuallt on your lap. You inevitably have to tilt the lappy to make the experience more comfy.

Hmm..I seriously wonder if lap tops were EVER meant to be placed on laps??!!

Cheese up!

I was just reminded of three of the cheesiest pick-up lines I've ever heard. Before I say any further, I find it pertinent to tell all of you that I came across them on Television, so don't blame me for the content.

1) A guy saying to a girl:

"Madam, I am your only Adam!"

I mean what?! Its old, its tacky and its sure to make the girl either run away or slap him right there on the face (and if really unlucky, then maybe a kick in the...)

2) This is by far the most hilarious I've heard. This was apparently used by a rather aunty-ish lady on John Abr. (so he says, on Koffee with Karan). The aunty (I like calling her that) comes up to him, gives an ineffectual seductive smile and says with a wink:

"I wanna go for a ride, and I don't mean your bike!"

Woaaah! Where did it even come from? Its one thing being innovative, but its another being, well, plain and simple sleazy. I can just imagine. The poor clueless John sipping his drink away to glory in a bar (where by the way, I think the entire incident took place) and comes this aunty to the hapless unsuspecting fellow and drops this bomb.

Now the interesting question is how do you think he would have reacted. My guesses are:

"umm..no thanks..I'm out of fuel"

or "umm..may be some other day..it's a bit...rusty abhi"

or a plain and simple "No thanks, I prefer riding alone"

[;) They always said I was good with puns!]

3) There's a third one also, but its beyond the scope of this blog..so if anyone wants to know it..too bad! just switch on the TV and sit waiting for it to Cheese up!